Trials and Tribulations of Assisted Reproduction
http://thedianerehmshow.org/shows/2012-04-23/trials-and-tribulations-assisted-reproduction
One in eight couples struggles with infertility. Some have medical problems, for others it’s age, and for some couples, the problem is never really identified. Major advances in fertility treatment in the last 30 years have helped many woman have children. But for those struggling with infertility, walking down the street or logging onto Facebook can be an emotionally fraught experience as they are come face to face with other people’s pregnancies and births. For those actively pursuing treatment, success doesn’t always come quickly, and sometimes it doesn’t come at all. Join Susan Page and her panel to discuss the trials and tribulations of assisted reproduction.
Guests
Dr. Paul Gindoff
Professor of Obstetrics & Gynecology at the George Washington University Medical Center and Director of The Fertility & IVF Center at The GW Medical Faculty Associates.
Belle Boggs
Author of "Mattaponi Queen" and the essay "The Art of Waiting," published in the March/April issue of Orion
Barbara Collura
executive director, RESOLVE - the National Infertility Association
Richard Allen
lawyer and writer
Program Highlights
Getting pregnant isn't always easy. For some it can take months or years. Some turn to assisted reproductive technology at a financial cost that can run to thousands of dollars, but the emotional costs can be even higher.
Infertility Is Fairly Common
One in every eight couples of reproductive age experiences some difficulty with fertility, Collura said. That's about 7.3 million Americans. Belle Boggs talked about her own experience with infertility, and she said she never thought it would happen to her. "You go through your life thinking that fertility and child rearing is a given," she said. Dr. Gindoff said infertility can be a challenge emotionally and psychologically, not just physically.
Cost Is A Huge Hurdle
Depending on what state in which someone lives, the cost of treating infertility can be a huge burden. Some insurance companies don't cover infertility treatments at all. "You don't get charged for a cesarean section or for an emergency appendectomy," Collura said. "No one has a 401K set aside for infertility treatments." There are a few states that have state mandates that allow insurance coverage for infertility, but that's less than 10 states, Collura said. Many couples end up spending thousands of dollars for each cycle - or chance to conceive - of IVF.
Having A Family Different From Having a Baby
Dr. Gindoff advises patients that their ultimate goal is usually having a family, which doesn't necessarily have to mean getting pregnant. Other options, of course, may include adoption, surrogacy, etc. "The ultimate goal is having a family and it's been sublimated into 'getting pregnant,' Gindoff said. "And getting pregnant has taken on a mystique and competition of its own, which leads itself to more stress and more psychological issues."
You can read the full transcript here.
Comments
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As we talk about the cost of reproduction therapies and the need for insurance coverage, it would be good to also consider the cost of adoption. Adoption is very expensive as well with even less chance of insurance coverage. My son and daughter in law have been going through IVF therapy for well over three years. The cost has been staggering and now that it looks unlikely they will get pregnant, they are at an end financially and because of the cost, will not be able to use adoption either.
After years of living with infertility, I was ultimately lucky enough to become a parent. Something that always distressed me was how often infertility patients are labeled as "selfish." I finally concluded that, yes, I was selfish. And so what? Who becomes a parent out of altruism? (With adoption, too, I've seen adoptive parents flinch when their child is told how lucky they are.)
As a fertility expert I am so grateful you have aired such an important show about infertility. Many women and men are unaware that by addressing their infertility through acupuncture and herbal medicine prescribed by a Traditional Chinese Herbal Medicine Fertility Expert they are twice as likely in 1/3 of the time to get pregnant in comparison to In-Vitro Fertilization IVF and Intra-Uterine Insemination IUI (Adelaide University Study 2011).
An added benefit with Acupuncture and Herbal Medicine treatment options are 1/10th of the cost and we address patients emotional distress as well. Typically OGBYN's refer to RE's (Reproductive Endocrinologists). Patients must educate themselves about their reproductive medical options and first seek treatment with an experienced Acupuncturist and Herbalist .
There are other studies on www.EagleAcupuncture.com proving female factor infertility and male factor infertility treatment.
Sincerely,
Kristen N. Burris, L.Ac., M.S.T.O.M. Women's Health and Fertility Expert
It is possible to empathize with the profound disappointment people who are really driven to have children must feel when they discover they cannot have them biologically. Without condemning any individual coping with this problem in his or her own particular way--people must feel what they feel--there are, nonetheless, larger economic and ecological concerns that this program is completely skirting. It never ceases to amaze me that discussions of this kind in no way address the fact of an already overpopulated world. It can be argued, I suppose, that curing disease also contributes to overpopulation and one would not advocate letting people die for that reason. Still, there are alternatives to the single-minded focus on propagating one's own personal genes. As other comments have pointed out, there are zillions of existing children needing homes and families. Why not adopt?
In addition, given the exorbitant cost of fertility treatments, one cannot help but conclude that this is a relatively luxurious problem fomented by a culture used to pluncking down its money and getting all it wants. Is it possible that at least in some instances babies are another commodity? It just strikes me that fertility treatments have got to be one of the more wasteful uses of medical dollars and know-how.
As someone who has dealt with infertility for years, I find it disheartening that so many of you (clearly none of whom have actually dealt with infertility yourselves) say that we should "just adopt". Adoption is a wonderful avenue for some people, but it is not for everyone. It is extremely expensive, and doesn't always work out. I know several people who were on adoption waiting lists for years, only to end up with no child and too old to be a parent. Since you have never walked in our shoes, I don't know how you can pass judgement on our situations. To desperately want a child and not be able to have one is devastating. "Just adopt" is one of the worst, most hurtful things you can tell to someone who is infertile. Please don't do it.
the prejudice of physicians if you are over 40 is overwhelming and really affects how everything turns out. i no longer have faith in most doctors because of the incompetence and nastiness of some of them.
most of them won't treat you if you're over 40 with bad numbers because they don't want it to bring down their success rates. so then you are stuck with the crappy ones. unless of course you are a celebrity, they'll keep trying until you have success if you're wealthy or famous.
it's all about money.
"Just adopt" is a very hurtful thing to say to someone who is struggling with infertility. It minimizes our struggle and really makes us upset. Take a walk in our shoes ...
I agree with JessRN that some of the responses here are cold, and that while many of the commenters here are female, the male perspective is important too. We have biological urges to be parents as well and it is certainly not about adoption vs. biological children. If we are lucky, we can do both, but both pose significant expenditures that are hard to justify with fragile jobs and more student loan debt than our mortgage. We married later in life and didn't have the benefit of exploring parenthood when were younger. We wrestle every day with the the physical, emotional, and financial impacts of our situation. It's a difficult process that will be different for every couple involved. Just yesterday we were in an IKEA and had to speedwalk through the children's area because the emotional impact of seeing so many young parents is so difficult. On other times, we find we are both attracted to young kids we see in other places and we don't have the same emotional reaction. We're in our early 40's so our future choices for a natural birth or adoption are increasingly limited. We don't expect or hope for a magic bullet. Our situation isn't special, but it is extremely difficult.
I am not surprised by the lack of sympathy expressed in many of the comments here. I used to feel much the same way myself - IVF is wasteful, possibly unethical, having children is not a right, "just adopt."
The reality for myself has been painfully eye-opening.
1) Infertility is not always related to women waiting too long because they are busy with their careers. Infertility happens to women of any age, and can be completely unpredictable.
2) Just because "biology" dictates your infertility does not mean that you should not seek treatment. To the mother who used the example of having a child with mental illness and just "accepting it," did you not also seek treatment for your child's illness?
3) Adoption is NOT easy. Domestic adoption is laden with legal uncertainties. Fraudulent adoption agencies abound. Birth mothers change their minds. It can be extremely expensive. International adoption is no simple task either, as fraud is probably even more of a problem. Many countries are also now shutting down their adoption programs.
My reasons for choosing IVF (which, again, I never thought I would do):
1) Wait lists for both domestic and international adoption are very long - China is now running 4-6 years. We are lucky to have good insurance and are able to try a few rounds of IVF while wrapping our heads around the idea of adoption.
3) I did not anticipate how incredibly sad my husband would be about not having a biological child. Like myself, my husband is an extremely practical and pragmatic person. The fact that he finds this so emotionally important has really shown me how personal these decisions are for all couples. As in all situations in life, judging others for their choices without having been in their shoes is unfair.
Given our planet's ecological crisis as mnifested in loss of wildlife habitat, endangered species, pollution and shortage of potable water, climate change,mineral depletion and a host of other ecological problems we should be focusing more on contraception rather than fertility. World population is expected to soar to @ 9 billion people in coming years ,if I rememeber correctly.
Furthermore, if the church is going to encourage constirction of contraception coverage for women, why should we be funding fertility?
Please consider seeking treatment from a Fertility Expert who treats patients with Acupuncture and Herbal Medicine. You are twice as likely in one third of the time to get pregnant compared to IVF (Adelaide University Study 2011). We do not need a western medical diagnosis to treat you or your partner for infertility. 1/3 female factor, 1/3 male factor, 1/3 unexplained so it's important both of you recieve treatment. Also, we are 1/10th of the cost of IVF with virtually no side-effects. If you do choose another IVF cycle Acupuncture increase successful birth rates by over 65% (Fertility and Sterility 2006 and 2008 and 2010) Visit www.EagleAcupuncture.com for more information and go to www.Acufinder.com to find a fertility expert using Acupuncture and Herbal Medicine. Sincerely, Kristen N. Burris, L.Ac., M.S.T.O.M. Fertility and Women's Health Expert
Please be sure to add Acupuncture to your IVF treatment. It increases your successful BIRTH rate by over 65% (Fertility and Sterility 2006, 2008, 2010) and addresses other aspects that are common during IVF cycles including: poor blood flow to your uterus, thin uterine lining, anxiety, depression, side-effects from the fertility drug protocol. It's always best to seek treatment from an Acupuncturist and Herbalist whose expertise is Infertility. www.EagleAcupuncture.com for more studies. Also, try www.Acufinder.com to see who lives near you. Sincerely, Kristen N Burris, L.Ac., M.S.T.O.M.
The problem many of us face is that infant adoption can cost upwards of $20,000. Those costs force many of us to choose between *trying* to have our own children in the first place and adoption. There is simply no way we can afford to do both.
@ jessica.o:
Why is it only the job of infertiles to adopt? Why should anyone get pregnant on their own with the amount of children in need of families in the world? God I hate it when people make such stupid statements!
I am open to adoption but @ this point my husband is not. We have been TTC for 4 years; I just turned 33 last week. So, we will be doing our 2nd round of IVF this summer. We're lucky to have some medical insurance coverage for infertility but the vast majority of people do not. Even with our coverage it's going to cost us over $3,000 as our co-pay with no guarantee it will work.
Adoption brings its own challenges. Like infertility tx, it is expensive. There is no such thing as "insurance" to help pay for it. The adoption tax credit has a lot of loopholes in it & is only after the fact & does not come close to covering expenses for most; you still have to up front the money to adopt
Also, adoption means being "studied" (judged) to see if you are a worthy parent. Wish they would do that with people who just have kids without medical intervention! And then if you do get lucky enough to have a child placed with you, there's a worry their birth parent will come back into the picture if you're fostering-to-adopt. I had this happen to a friend & it was heartbreaking.
1. Embryos are not "implanted"; they are "transfered". If they were implanted, then everyone who did IVF would get pregnant. This is not the case.
2. There are still costs associated with an FET (frozen embryo transfer). Plus, there are costs due to "adopting" an embryo (lawyer fees). Not cheap!
I feel the pressure of getting pregnant is overrated by the society in general. Being a mother or nurturing can be done in so many ways. I feel some women that have not given birth to children have more love to share and give to not only kids but to everybody around them. I have seen mothers who have beard many children, I have seen mothers who are in their retirement age, have gone through the entire journey of motherhood but still do not have love and passion.
After watching my 28 yr old daughter struggle with infertility for over 3 years(Clomid, IUI, IVF attempts that were successful then ended in miscarriage) our family was fortunate to help our daughter and son-in-law have their biological child via surrogacy. The system is unfair, allowing infertility to become an issue of class - affordable only to a few. I have now established Baby Quest, a non-profit charity to award grant money to those struggling with infertility. Within four months, we have given out two awards - one to a Reno couple and the other to a couple in Cincinnati. Our goals are ambitious and challenging. Please visit our website:babyquestfoundation.org.
My goodness people. ADOPT. If a person cannot consider adoption s as a viable option, even after going through all the grief and pain of trying to conceive for years, I have to wonder how qualified one really is to be a parent at all.
AMEN!
If someone wants kids so badly but isn't willing to consider adoption then I question their overall motive for having kids.
My husband and I have also tried for 4 years , we went through 1 miscarriage, an ectopic pregnancy where I almost lost my life, 1 failed adoption, 2 failed IVF's ...and a partridge in a pear tree. Fortunately for us my insurance is covering 4 tries w/ a donor. Although it can be emotionally heartbreaking, we don't want to give up. IVF is just too costly to throw those "tries" away if insurance will cover it. I have to be hopeful, and if it happens, great and if not, we will have to accept it .......were just not to that point yet. God bless you all who are trying.
Adoption isn't as simple as you think, we have been down that road and although there are tax breaks, you dont recieve that money until the next filing year, that did us no good when the agencies want you to give them 20 + thousand for a child that they should just give you if they were really in it "for the sake of the child".
Pamela, I am so thrilled to have "met" you and so impressed with your efforts to address one of the most challenging aspects to many of infertility, the financial one! The costs are exorbitant - I spent our entire savings in a desperate frenzied way - in hindsight it seemed like addictive behavior, and I would calculate to the penny how much I was paying off on credit cards so that I knew what I could deposit right back in the bank. My spouse had NO idea, I was hiding it all. Thank you for your work, let's spread the word and get you more funding!
Thank you! I wish your comment was read on the air.
Thanks Diane for doing this program! What a tremendous hour, covering so many different topics and challenges under the umbrella of infertility and IVF.
I found particular interest in the discussion about the male point of view, which is the focus of my blog: www.infertilit-he.com
It's not quite as articulate as Belle Boggs' piece!
My husband and I struggled with infertility (his) for 12 years before adopting an American son. It was frustrating, expensive and painful emotionally- every fertility cycle that didn't result in a pregnancy felt like another failure. My husband continued to have procedures (thankfully), and after 17 years I became pregnant for the one and only time in my life and gave birth to another son at age 35.
It was a miracle, (the doctors said it was not possible), and a life saver for me, because as it turned out, our adopted son (seemingly healthy for the first year) came in with myriads of emotional disorders and syndromes and problems that will be lifelong, and I have gone into great debt to care for him. I doubt he will ever have a normal life. It is extremely sad, as he is now 25 yrs. old and not any better. Hope is fading.
So, without having had our biological child (who is the opposite- thoughtful, respectful, loving, caring and appreciative) - I imagine I may have been devastated.
Adoption is something to do a lot of research about before undertaking. We thought we had been so fortunate to get a "healthy" baby- but it did not turn out that way. People told me to give him up,
but I couldn't do that- I made a commitment.
Of course- one never knows how their biological child will turn out either- it is all a gamble, but none of this parenting business should be taken lightly!
Huge thanks to milo and anyone else who commented who has been through it. In my experience with infertility, I have reacted in ways that I never would have expected. I am usually a very open person, and had an incredibly hard time sharing the news with friends and family. Infertility comes with complex emotions that you can't fully understand until you've been there.
For those who are saying people should just look to adopt, while I agree that adoption is incredibly rewarding, it is also difficult to get there. Waiting lists are incredibly long and it can be just if not more expensive than fertility treatments. Also consider that many people, including myself and my husband, are doing fertility treatments while also pursuing adoption.
people like the say the dumbest stuff like where going to be overpopulated and why don't you adopt first of all people are meant to be born and whoever said that probably wasn't thinking about being overpopulated when he or she was born people say infertile people are selfish that's a lye cause that would mean that every parent in this world is selfish no it's because we have so much to give and also every adopted child has a biological parent so there is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting our own biological children and it hurts sometimes because the people who don't want there kids hurt them kill them abort them abuse them all on the news and in society have them but the one's who can love them protect them and give them a good life cannot THINK ABOUT THAT