Myla Goldberg: "The False Friend"
http://thedianerehmshow.org/shows/2010-10-13/myla-goldberg-false-friend
The bestselling author of the Bee Season presents her latest novel. It's a complex psychological drama about what happens when the ignorance of youth comes crashing against the wisdom of adulthood.
Guests
Myla Goldberg
bestselling author of "Bee Season" and "Wickett's Remedy."
Comments
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Myla,
Your book "Time's Magpie" was an excellent travel book and made my trip to Prague much more enjoyable. After reading your description of the sidewalks in Prague, I took the most interesting photos of the sidewalks which have provided me happy memories of a great trip.
thanks.
Rae
Ms Goldberg made very insightful comments about memory. Memory is an essential ingredient of our mind. Without memory we would not know who we are. Henry Molaison could attest to that.
Read more here:
http://brainmindinst.blogspot.com/2009/02/theory-of-mind-ii-hms-memory.html
I can relate to this topic as I was an inconsiderate and often mean child, never afraid of anything. As an adult, people see me as very conservative and are surprised to hear about what I was like in middle, high school and even early twenties. I have learned to bite my tongue.
Always inspired by this show to read new books/authors.
Congratulations on the new novel Myla! Great interview, and I can't wait to read The False Friend!
That is so wrong to say that persistence is important as a writer now. The truth is you better fit the generic mold before you offer your writing. If you are a zine writer, blogger, or writer of any genre outside of formula novels or over padded non fiction , you are out of luck. Persistence? How about you going to a bank and asking for free money? They say no? Just be persistent!!!! The best writers now are not in the mainstream and they are not on Diane Rehm's 2nd hour book Show. How about doing a show on how you get your writing promoted on DR show and why the best writers are out of the system?
I agree. The exclusion never stops. Here's my story: We moved to a subdivision where most families have children in elementary school or another on the way. At first, I was welcomed- they always asked when I would have children. After a few years, they stopped asking and then associating. Facebook clued me into the fact that I was being purposely excluded and analyzed. I never confronted the "mean girls" though it did crystalize for me that we are, in fact, very different.
By the way, I grew up in an abusive home and NEVER was unkind to kids around me; I think it made me more sensitive.
I greatly appreciate hearing that this issue of bullying is being address. My sons were bullied throughout their school life and have grown up to be very kind and generous adult men. We have had lot's of conversations that just because someone says something you don' t have to believe it. The most discouraging bullying came from teachers. How do you rectify this behavior to children?
I greatly appreciate hearing that this issue of bullying is being address. My sons were bullied throughout their school life and have grown up to be very kind and generous adult men. We have had lot's of conversations that just because someone says something you don' t have to believe it. The most discouraging bullying came from teachers. How do you rectify this behavior to children?
I had an unusual situation in grade school. My mom bullied me beyond belief so I was pre-programmed to BE a victim by everyone else. The other girls in 5th grade tested me and I flunked. I was a perfect victim because I didn't know how to fight back, stand up for myself or BELIEVE that I was "okay". My mother told me I wasn't okay...so the other little girls succeeded for three or four years!~ This is a subject that has no black and white conclusion...it barely has a gray area...and it's too complex to assume anyone has all the answers. I speak up whenever I can when I witness a bullying mother, or a child anywhere being bullied. [Two areas I can truly relate with.] Human beings need to spend more time on empathy, kindness and living by the golden rule. Bullying begets more bullying...UNLESS you fight it from within. I'm glad this subject is being taken seriously these days. My heart goes out the parents of the kids who committed suicide. I contemplated suicide so often as a child, I look back in amazement that I didn't succeed!
I give great credit to my mother who always said "You don't have to go with the crowd". This attitude was instilled in me and allowed me to stand up to bigger tougher boys. My own attitude and confidence kept them at bay on more than one occasion.
Thanks Ma!
I am a middle school teacher and often I think my students do no see their conduct as bullying but being clever and attention getting. Many of their actions are copying what they see on reality tv shows. Much of what they see in the media rewards bully type behavior.
Bullying is transparent evidence of a dysfunctional home environment.
Teachers, administrators and guidance counselors ALL let the causal dysfunction to go unchecked. Disruptive children should be removed.
Consider the consequences:
I'm sure there is direct correlation to poor academic performance and low test scores (for both perpetrators and victims), which in turn impacts teacher performance reveiws, education budgets and real estate values.
WHY would ANY parent send their child to a school where unchecked bullying destroys the learning environment?
I hold teachers and administrators responsible. Their complacency is collusion.
I've experienced the same thing as your guest, Myla. I am an adult now, and extremely nonviolent. In acting class, I can't even bring myself to slap another actor when required in a scene.
But, when I was in grammar school, I can remember several incidents of being violent, especially to my best friend. I pulled her chair away at the last minute once and watched her land on her butt. Another time, I struck her on the back with my fist - actions that I would never think of doing now. My "family" is extremely dysfunctional, and I know I must have been a very sad, angry child on the inside, and I was taking it out on my best friend. To this day, I cannot believe I was ever capable of that because I'm such a different person today. Maybe even too passive.
Thank you for helping to enlighten us about this subject. My daughter was bullied in 5th grade and spent the next three years in and out of psychiatric wards suffering from anxiety, suicide attempt, and depression. Her recovery has consumed our family's lives - financially, emotionally and physically, all because some boys decided she was easy prey.
Now that she is well, I've started blogging about our experiences at www.blog.outoftherabbithole.com in the hopes of helping other families who are suffering as well.
I thought it was quite interesting when Diane asked you how you had time to be an author & play in a band when you have a young child. You commented & giggled at the same time saying "she is in daycare." This is the prime example that Dr. Laura Schlessenberg speaks about every single day. Don't you think that it would be more important to be your daughter's full time mommie instead of the daycare workers raising your daughter.
It will be interesting to see if your daughter becomes solid in her self or will be bullied. If you raised your daughter full time while you wrote, she would see a beautiful, strong mother that can raise her & work & she may become the same way instead of being under the influence of stronger children who may just bully her too.
Also, no one commented on putting children into karate or some other form of physical exercise & learn how to defend themselves......